Treasure Your Time: A Slow Moment with Carl Honoré

In our turbo-charged world, bestselling author Carl Honoré fearlessly challenges the Cult of Speed

 

 

Steep a fantastic tea, get into a comfortable chair and savour the words that are about to unfurl on this page.  They are important words, maybe even lifechanging.  By now, dear readers, you know I own a little tea and spice shop in Kitchener, Ontario.  It is accurate to say I have met all walks of life in this business (oh, fortunate me): a little girl tasting her first tea, a transport trucker who likes his loose leaf to go, senseis and tattoo artists.  Different as they may be, there's indeed a common thread: speed, or rather slowness.  Us tea folk are perhaps a bit odd, but there's something downright magical about taking the time to watch your beautiful oolong leaves unfold into winding black dragons.   Tea leaves dance in our cup. Steam tendrils fill the air. Hands embrace the warmth and our minds embrace the peace.  See, we're unlike our highly-energized and fast-paced coffee counterparts.  We savour that moment in time with our tea, even if it's the only moment we have; sacred it is. Don't. Interrupt. My. Tea.  I've thought a lot about these moments of serenity.  They are widely lacking in most of our lives, I'd say.  That's when it occurred to me that perhaps chatting with the King of Slow himself, Carl Honoré, might shed some light on this speed-obsessed culture of ours.  What is it doing to us?  Can we change it?

First, let me tell you this:  Carl Honoré is one seriously busy  man.  He is the bestselling author of several books on this very subject of SLOW (In Praise of Slow, Under Pressure and his most recent book The Slow Fix which is into its third week on Maclean's Canadian national bestseller list - way to go, Carl!).  I've read In Praise of Slow and my eyes are open to a new way of living.  Carl's books have been translated into numerous languages and he travels the world on speaking engagements.  That's because his message resonates across the globe.  I am more than honored that he took his time to speak with me on this subject of Slow.   When I approached Carl with my "tea drinker vs. coffee drinker" suspicions, he supported my ramblings (insert big sigh o' relief HERE).  He shared that in the European coffeehouses of the 18th and 19th centuries, people gathered to share big ideas and watch the world roll past (sigh, a romantic notion, really).  He also notes that in this current world of ours, we've turned coffee into rocket-fuel for our fast-forward lifestyles.  Tea, however, remains true to its slow roots....and it really does.  Ceremonious, it is.  Without further ado, I'd like to share what we talked about.  It has made a personal impact on me and his message is one I innately know to be true.  You'll quickly (or slowly?) realize that Carl savours quality -  his responses to my questions have clearly been thought out carefully; that makes me feel good...and maybe that's what this is about.  This highly digitized world of ours has us living fast, but it also lets us share messages worthy of sharing - enjoy:

1.  Upon reading In Praise of Slow, I realize you kind of had an epiphany as you read a newspaper waiting to board a plane.  I think epiphanies are years in the making.  Why did the article you were reading ("60 second bedtime stories"...or something to that effect) strike you SO much in that moment of time?

Carl:  It's hard to say why, to be honest. I agree that epiphanies are usually years in the making. They are the fruit of a long, slow accretion of insight, feeling and understanding. Before reading about the one-minute bedtime stories, I had known for a long time that something was wrong in my life. It was full and exciting but something was missing. Like a lot of people stuck in roadrunner mode, I never really slowed down long enough to confront my own malaise and try to work out its roots. I was too busy! I must have reached straw-that-broke-the-camel's-back moment without even realising it. An illness or injury could have tipped me over the edge into this epiphany. Or it could have been a crisis at work. But in the end it was suddenly realising that I was in such a hurry that I was even prepared to accelerate those precious bedtime moments with my son at the end of the day. Perhaps that's because my relationships are the most important thing to me. Whatever the reason, I'm glad my epiphany came in that form and not as a heart attack!


2. Doesn’t the whole world have to embrace the slow movement?  I ask this because as a newbie, I wonder/worry that if I embrace and live the philosophy of the slow movement, that the world will leave me behind inthe dust because the world ITSELF is fast.

Carl: In an ideal world, everyone would embrace the Slow philosophy tomorrow. But unfortunately we don't live in an ideal world. We're talking about a cultural revolution that will reinvent the way we do everything - eat, work, consume, travel, raise our children, relate to each other, and so on. That won't happen overnight. And it won't happen without a lot of people having the courage of their convictions and the willingness to challenge the bankrupt status quo.

The world will not leave you behind if you slow down in a way that allows you to live a rich, fulfilling life. Or at least it won't leave you behind in ways that matter. It is not easy to slow down in a world that glorifies speed and denigrates slowness. But it is possible. No man is an island and when we start slowing down we have to take account of the impact on people around us. That involves warning friends and colleagues, explaining why your are going to do less, unplug your technology more, and ask for more time for work projects. I was afraid at first that this was going to alienate people, and initially some were skeptical. But very soon people began to understand that they could no longer reach me 24 hours a day; that I wasn’t going to say yes to every social and work offer; that I might like a bit more time for a job. What I found is that people around me, after a time of watching me slow down, began to implement similar changes in their own lives.

Explaining why you are going to slow down is essential. Together we all need to tackle the taboo against slowness. If you make the case the Slow means better, people understand – and are more willing to accept your deceleration than if you just slowed down without explaining.

A final thought: I do believe a Slow Revolution is possible. Just look at parallels from history. Take the rise of feminism. In the 60s, when feminists said the world was unjust and the moment for change had come, the mainstream reaction was: "No, the world has always been this way. You can't change it. Go back to the kitchen!" But look at the world today. Obviously there is a long way to go to create a world of perfect gender equality, but a woman today could hardly imagine how severely life was limited for her grandmother. I look at my sister and my grandmother and marvel at the change in just two generations. And the green movement has followed a similar arc: it was dismissed as a plaything for hippies and tree-huggers thirty years ago but today is near the top of the political agenda. The message is that the world can change, if we want it to. For a cultural revolution to occur, you need three factors: the need for change; an awareness of the need for change; and people willing to put that change into practice. We now have all three factors in place for the Slow revolution to push on. I think the Slow movement is at the same point as feminism or green-ism was 30 or 40 years ago. We won't change the world, or make it Slow, by next year. It will take time. The Slow revolution will be slow…But I believe it will happen.

3. Give me a peek into your life for a moment, if you will.  With a busy life as a successful writer/speaker, dad, husband, sports enthusiast, book tours, etc….how do YOU uphold the slow movement?

Carl: I have definitely changed - there is for me a very clear Before and After. Before I was always trying to do more and more things in less and less time. I was all about speed and quantity. I felt hurried all the time. Now I approach each thing seeking to do it as well as possible instead of as fast as possible. This has made a big change in the way I feel about time: I no longer feel a slave to it. I feel like I have enough time for things and I never feel rushed (even though I have an exciting, full life). This is not a paradox. It’s about finding the right equilibrium and not being obsessively neurotic about time. My first step was realizing that I had got stuck in fast-forward, and that too much speed was doing me damage. Then I began making concrete changes. I cut back on the things I was trying to cram into my schedule to allow more time to rest and to devote to the things that are more important to me. So I dropped one sport (tennis - I still play hockey, soccer, squash and running) and reduced my TV-watching to a few hours a week, instead of a few hours a day. I also stopped wearing a watch, which seemed to make me less neurotic about time. I take breaks during the work day to relax, eat and do a bit of meditation. I also do regular yoga. And I switch off my technology (email, cellphone, etc) whenever possible, instead of being always connected. I have learned to say “No” to things - work, social offers, etc - to avoid getting over-scheduled. This is especially important in my work. I get lots and lots of offers to write, speak, consult and it is tempting to do them all, but if I did I would become the opposite of what I’m preaching. So I choose the jobs that I think are the most important in order to keep a balance in my life. So I do fewer things but I do them better and enjoy them more. I now have time for those moments that give life meaning and texture – reading a leisurely bedtime story to my children, enjoying a glass of wine with my wife in the evening, chatting with a neighbour, stopping and staring at a beautiful building or sunset. I feel like I’m living my life now instead of racing through it.

 

4. Do you think most people fail to identify that they are even living ‘fast’ in the first place (the way we are raised in this society completely grooms us for ‘fast’, in my opinion)?

Carl:  Totally. We are so marinated in the culture of speed that we often lose sight of the damage it does to every aspect of our lives, including our diet, health, relationships and even our work. And when we feel things are going wrong, our instinct is not to blame an excess of speed because the message all around us is that "Speed is Good." It's even woven into our vernacular. "You snooze you lose," we tell ourselves. Or we have to "get up to speed," as if speed and acceleration are the answer to every problem. Speed is also a mechanism of denial, a way of running away from and avoiding the big, hard questions in life. When your head is full of constant distraction and busyness, you never ask yourself:  Am I really ok? What is my true purpose in life? Because all you can think about is the next item on your To Do list or the next email pinging into your inbox. So often you find that when people need to slow down, they do the exact opposite: they speed up.

The deep cultural taboo against slowness - slow is a pejorative term, a byword for lazy, torpid, unproductive, stupid -- means that even when we can feel in our bones that putting on the brakes would be good for us, we are afraid or ashamed to do it.

 

5. I want to start moving my life toward the slow movement.   What is the very best place to start for someone new to this concept?

Carl: The first thing  is to do less. Look at your schedule and cut back on the stuff that is not essential – that might meaning watching less TV, reducing the extracurricular activities of your children, saying No to the occasional social invitations, or working less. Depends on the person. It’s important to accept that you can’t do everything.

Find moments when you can switch off the technology. Mobile phones, laptops, pagers etc are all wonderful tools but we all need time to be unplugged. We need moments of silence, with interruptions, to recharge and reflect. Even the big tech companies increasingly understand this. A senior manager at IBM has launched a “slow email” movement. He loves email but recommends that we check it less in order to be happier and more creative. And that’s IBM, not a yoga school. Orange, a leading UK mobile phone company, ran a campaign based on the idea that good things happen (you bond with your kids, you fall in love, etc) when your phone is switched off!

Build into your day one activity that forces you to slow down. This could be anything – yoga, gardening, reading a book, taking a walk with the phone switched off, soaking in the bath. Anything that shifts you into a lower gear.

It’s also important to remember that slowing down is often a good way to be more productive at work. We are all so seduced by the idea that we have to be busy all the time that we fail to see that we would work better by putting on the brakes from time to time. 

6. One more question!  Can BUSINESS embrace the slow movement and see success?

Carl: Yes, and it's already happening!

The economic crisis of recent years is a searing wake-up call, a reminder that our fast-forward way of life is pernicious and unsustainable. The economy was all about fast growth, fast profits and fast consumption – and look at how it almost steered us into an economic apocalypse. People at every level in business are starting to understand that we need profound change in the way we run our economies and societies, and in the way we work and live together. 

There is a danger that businesses will only embrace Slow as a fig leaf. That means using the Slow message to sell products that are not very Slow in spirit - and there are many examples of that. Other businesses pay lip service to work-life balance and corporate responsibility.

But there are many businesses that are genuinely embracing Slow. That means allowing staff more freedom to control their own time and pace. It also means building businesses that look beyond the bottom line in an effort to become good corporate citizens. We still have a very, very long way to go but the hunger for this change is clear, and some forward-looking companies are starting to change.

 

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Not only was Carl kind enough to answer my questions, he also provided 7 tips on how to start slowing down, visit them here. Very worth it, I promise.

 

Carl Honoré is an award-winning journalist, author and TED speaker.  The Wall Street Journal called him “an in-demand spokesman on slowness.”  I think our glimpse into this  man can understand why.   All I can say is run out and read his work today.  Available for the eReader folks, too.  

 

Thank you, Carl, for bringing an important message to our speedcentric culture.   May you be enjoying a slow tea as you read this.  Cheers to living a happy, enriched life!   It's something we all deserve.